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And it’s true, I think actually the more conservative they are often means that the more that they’ll be malleable when they get into the bedroom.

Whereas the ones who release all of their sexual energy in the club or the way they dress might not be quite so energetic.

[Angel Donovan]: [Laughs] [David Tian]: Oh, you mean, like not hamburgers and burgers and pizza? [Angel Donovan]: [Laughs] [David Tian]: But anyway, so yeah, Asia—you know, I did my Ph D in the Asian studies department, and even there we felt a pretty big divide between South Asia, which is mainly represented by India and the surrounding countries there, and Southeast Asia, and then East Asia. Whereas in Asia I think it’s because there's a name for it, I mean there's a concept and it’s very well-known and accepted, is they’re more sensitive to those issues. [David Tian]: [Laughs] [Angel Donovan]: So you know, I mean this is actually very, very practical and useful advice here. And then when you come back to the West you actually see these things really powerful, because now you see like kind of in more depth how women are because you’ve noticed these subtle things and now you can see them… [Angel Donovan]: Because they were magnified in Asia. You know what, the way I think about it is when you go back to New York or Toronto or LA, you can be messy. [David Tian]: You can let go, be loose, and shit happens and you touched too far or you might spit out [laughs] because you’ve had too much to drink, and you can get away with all that.

[Angel Donovan]: I think the great thing I learned in Asia was I learned about these things on a more subtle level because you have to [laughs]…

So it’s something that you’d kind of be denying her if you don’t take control.

[David Tian]: Yeah, and I think you do have to lead more though. [David Tian]: But she needs to know that she has permission to be this way.

I think society has looked down on that sort of behavior for so long… [David Tian]: Yeah, you do have to be more dominant there. Critical is great, but if you're rude, we'll delete your stuff.

[Angel Donovan]: Right, and I guess it’s setting the frame, because you know, judging people, like in the West we talk about like you should never judge girls, right? Please do not put your URL in the comment text or use your business name as your name, as it looks like spam.

The more modern of women, in terms of the stereotypical modern woman, actually we’ll find a lot of these office-lady types in many Asian cities, and they might not be quite so feminine. And I think the point that becomes important to understand is apart from the fact that it’s a very interesting characteristic and something that, you know, if you haven’t experienced before, something that is worthwhile exploring maybe, is that you could see that femininity and those attributes and those characteristics as kind of like a lack of sexuality that you kind of see in the West, and that kind of makes you think, “Oh, she’s not interested in sex,” or “She’s not going to be as sexual.” [David Tian]: Mm-hmm. [David Tian]: Yeah, I coach a lot of Asian guys, so I think that they too are a little bit more on the feminine side of things just as men, and I think they suffer in pop culture from being overly feminized.He's a doctor (Ph D) of Asian studies and was a professor at National University of Singapore for Philosophical Psychology and Asian Philosophy. So when I’m talking to them they look down or they’ll look away, or they'll do the shy thing or they’ll look disinterested.So he has a really good academic, rigorous background into the whole area of Asian culture and psychology, and that's something that he's used within his dating coaching business, which has helped him. Then I put my arm around them, and suddenly they kind of look at me sheepishly but then they look back down, and I can just start doing stuff and I don’t get any resistance. I’d never seen this happen in Michigan.” But it was a lot of just understanding the way that… You do see this sometimes in the West, and of course when we talk about Western dating you have to lead and all of this, but it just becomes really, really important in Asia because you’re never going to get the girl who kind of like takes the situation in hand.And you should never judge someone in a relationship and stuff because it doesn’t allow for open communication and the development of a relationship. [Angel Donovan]: In Asia I’d say this is even more important, and what I do, I don’t know if you do this, like I’ve got a Korean girlfriend at the moment and she’s quite young, so she actually hasn’t had many sexual experiences. Have fun and thanks for adding to the conversation!So I made a very proactive stance to open her mind sexually when we were going out together, and I've completely unjudging and very open to talk about everything very openly so that she could follow that frame. You’re saying, “Hey, it’s alright to talk about all this stuff,” right? DSR Podcast is a weekly podcast where Angel Donovan seeks out and interviews the best experts he can find from bestselling authors, to the most experienced people with extreme dating lifestyles.

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